Did Jesus Hate Broccoli?

And Other Theologically Irrelevant Questions About the Christ

  • Was Jesus an annoying baby?
  • Was the son of God a bratty toddler?
  • Did Jesus hate broccoli?
  • Was our Lord and Savior ugly?
  • Was the King of Kings good at sports?
  • Was Jesus a bad carpenter?
  • Was Mary ever like “Excuse me? A denarius for a chicken? Do you know who my son is?”
  • When asked who is father was, did Jesus say “funny story…”
  • Was Jesus funny?
  • Did Jesus smell funny?
  • Did Jesus ever stub his toe, like really, really badly and shout “GAHH, ME”?
  • Did the Lamb of God ever do that thing where you cough and burp at the same time?
  • Who would Jesus root for in the Super Bowl?
  • Could Jesus sing?
  • Did the Messiah hate mosquitos? (trick question; everyone hates mosquitos)
  • If Jesus were a pokemon, which one would he be?
  • How much wood could a Jesus chuck if a Jesus could chuck wood?
  • Which church would Jesus attend if he were alive today? (Another trick question. Answer: Lighthouse.)