And Other Theologically Irrelevant Questions About the Christ

• Was Jesus an annoying baby?
• Was the son of God a bratty toddler?
• Did Jesus hate broccoli?
• Was our Lord and Savior ugly?
• Was the King of Kings good at sports?
• Was Jesus a bad carpenter?
• Was Mary ever like “Excuse me? A denarius for a chicken? Do you know who my son is?”
• When asked who is father was, did Jesus say “funny story…”
• Was Jesus funny?
• Did Jesus smell funny?
• Did Jesus ever stub his toe, like really, really badly and shout “GAHH, ME”?
• Did the Lamb of God ever do that thing where you cough and burp at the same time?
• Who would Jesus root for in the Super Bowl?
• Could Jesus sing?
• Did the Messiah hate mosquitos? (trick question; everyone hates mosquitos)
• If Jesus were a pokemon, which one would he be?
• How much wood could a Jesus chuck if a Jesus could chuck wood?
• Which church would Jesus attend if he were alive today? (Another trick question. Answer: Lighthouse.)