“Don’t get comfortable. I am going to move this mountain, then I’m going to move you in.” While I, ironically, have never actually been the biggest fan of Christian radio, I think Brandon Heath is on to something here.
I was comfortable in high school. I was comfortable in who I was as a person, I was comfortable within the context of the relationships I had formed, comfortable at the religious school I attended, comfortable at my church’s youth group, comfortable in my faith. I was positive that at the ripe old age of seventeen, I had found the answers. If ever a doubt crossed my mind in terms of my faith, I would squelch it as soon as it registered. While I have always been someone who asks questions and studies my faith’s background and traditions, I have not always been okay with allowing myself to doubt. If I could not immediately look up the answer, or if a thought crossed my mind that caused discomfort in any way, I would cling back to what I already believed and understood.
Currently, in my junior year of college, I am now finding myself choosing to venture out into the unknown. I have lately been engaging in conversations with those around me who hold certain beliefs that are different from my own, and I have learned to love and celebrate the differences we all bring to the Lighthouse community. I’m finding that multiple perspectives can often enrich faith – not necessarily contradict it. Throughout these conversations, I have been faced with questions and doubts relating to free will and God’s omniscience, separation of Church and State, when to take the Bible literally vs. allegorically and metaphorically, the concept of hell… all these among many others. When faced with these difficult questions and concepts, I can choose either to avoid opening the many cans of worms entirely, or I can acknowledge the value in the search for wisdom and understanding through conversation, fellowship, and prayer.
Now, you will notice I did not mention finding answers to these questions and doubts. I believe there is something so powerful in being in fellowship with others while attempting to scratch the surface of these matters of faith. Knowing we may never reach an answer or conclusion is uncomfortable and challenging, but it is only through stretching ourselves that we are able to grow.
God is moving mountains within me. Sometimes I feel like I’m on top of that mountain. At other times, it seems as if the climb will never cease. Regardless of where within that spectrum I happen to fall on any given day, I am realizing the intrinsic value in that climb. I will always continue to ask those tough questions; the difference now is that I am learning to accept the response, “I don’t know that I have the answer. Let’s walk this journey together.”